The most recent annoyance in my life

So I'm on my way to work yesterday morning and I'm really thirsty. I have a conversation in my head about how I'm trying to be better about making spontaneous stops and buying expensive drinks at a gas station when I can get them in bulk much cheaper at a grocery store. I look at the clock. I'm running out of time and a Sobe and perhaps a nutrigrain bar are calling my name.

I think I can make it so I get in the left lane and turn into the nearest gas station. My wheels are on fire as I pull up beside the building and thrust the gear shift into park. With bank card in hand, I run into the building. There are two cashiers up front and they are reading a magazine.

They don't even bother to look up (hello! customer service!) as I dash in and browse the store quickly to find what I'm looking for. Success! They have both the Sobe I like to drink (it's the yellow one and the name of it escapes me) and a blueberry nutrigrain bar. I run up to the counter and notice that the magazine the cashiers are reading is none other than the most wanted list. OK. And these are the first words I hear from cashier #1 and cashier #2 (from here on out known as tweedle dumb and tweedle dee).

Tweedle Dee: (Looking upon each face intently) "Ya know. I'm so surprised I haven't seen my ex Ajax in here."

It takes me a minute to figure out that she is talking about a person and not a household cleaner.

Tweedle Dumb: All I get from here is a quick glance. No "Hello. How are you today?" Just grabs my merchandise and starts scanning.....extremely slowly. She does however take the time to start playing with her co-workers hair until she exclaims:

Tweedle Dee: "Stop messin' with my hair fool!"

Tweedle Dumb: "I'm sorry but you're up here lookin' like Alfalfa!" Hee hee hee. Giggle giggle giggle.

Ah! She can speak. Look at that.

What seems like an eternity later, Tweedle dumb reaches for my debit card and swipes it. They continue to look at their magazine. (Seriously?)

Tweedle Dumb: "He's kinda cute!"

REALLY! OH MY GOD!

Finally I get my receipt and I stare at it. Tweedle dumb has not informed me whether I need to sign it or not but I see no line at the bottom and she's refusing to make eye contact. I stare for a split second as each of the two nitwits continue to look at their "magazine". I shake my head, grab my beloved merchandise and head for the door. But not before seeing out of the corner of my eye, the next customer in line walking up to the counter.

Here we go, I think to myself. I wonder if he'll have something to say about all of this.

Tweedle Dumb: "Hey! How are you today?" Giggle giggle giggle.

Are you kidding me!

I storm off to my car, throw open the driver's side and plop down into my seat. Then I start to laugh to myself. I didn't see the guy's face, but I wonder if he was as "cute" as one of the most wanted criminals that these two girls were admiring. Must have been it. Unbelievable!